TIFF 2012 – DAY FOUR

* After battling the subway to get to Place Beyond The Pines yesterday, I decide to forgo my morning rushes and head straight to Isabel Bader for Much Ado About Nothing. This is the one film I was most anticipating and I WILL get a good seat or die trying.

* Subways still out of commission. I make a note to time how long it takes me to get to my final stop so I know when I have to leave to get to work on time. It is not promising.

* Get in line and I’m like, 5th from the front. I also have at least a 2 hour wait. Don’t care. Too excited. Steph eventually joins me and we catch up and mutually gush over how excited we will be if Joss himself actually shows.

* We are second row. And Joss is in attendance.

* The minute he walked on stage I was just a big ball of emotions trapped in a meat sack. I don’t know how I can accurately describe to you how it feels to see your idol and your hero, live and in person, introducing his latest creation. And to know that you will be experiencing this creation WITH HIM IN THE ROOM. It was amazing.

* The movie was really good. Yes, I’m biased, but whatever. I laughed my ass off, I was moved multiple times by Fran Kraz’s performance and was reminded just how incredibly talented Amy Acker is. The whole cast was great though.

* Movie ends and half the cast comes out – Alexis Densiof, Amy Acker, Sean Maher, Clark Gregg, Tom Lenk, Reed Diamond, Ashley Johnson… It’s insane and wonderful and I am taking a bajillion pictures.

* I am coming dangerously close to being late for work. They’re still talking. I can’t bring myself to leave.

* Q&A ends and I am officially running late for work. I’m totally fucked. As I try to rush my way out I somehow take a sneaky side exit that gets me out on a patio area where the talent is?! I am too discombobulated to notice. I don’t realize until I am out on the street but at that point I see Joss is like, 3 feet from me getting into his car and I lose all ability to function.

* I was SO CLOSE to him. And I wanted to say something, say anything! But I just couldn’t. I didn’t know what to say or how to say it without sounding like Annie Wilkes from Misery. He gets in the car and leaves and I immediately regret my cowardice.

* Finally get to the subway and it is not running on time. I am now past “running” late and am just plain old late. Guilt begins to eat at my insides.

* I show up 45 minutes late. Turns out I was one of two scheduled cashiers, so two other girls from the morning shift have stayed. I want to retch and die. My supervisor is the sweetest human being ever and he just keeps saying, “don’t worry, it’s ok, you’re fine, everything’s fine, just breathe, take your time, it’s not a big deal, I’m just glad to see you,” amidst my nonstop hurried apologies.

* Work is long, and I feel badly through most of it. We do get into a discussion about television though and that makes me feel better. The more Vanya and I talk, the more I am sure we are meant to be friends.

* At the end of the shift I am the last to cash out but the first to finish for the night – ten years of retail experience makes me quite adept at balancing a float and counting cash in a hurry. The other girls are struggling though and again, guilt overtakes me. I help them count their money and make it balance. I still end up leaving first. Make a promise to myself to be early tomorrow.

* Vanya talks me into rushing Hellbenders at Midnight Madness. While waiting in the rush line we are given free tickets! Huzzah!

* The movie is in 3D, which in retrospect seems a little unnecessary. It was a solid concept, and it was fairly funny, but mostly I found it disappointing. I wanted so much more scares! I got hardly any.

THINGS I LEARNED DAY FOUR:

1) I am NOT emotionally or mentally prepared to meet Joss Whedon. At all.

2) Steph and I can go almost a year without seeing each other, but when we get together we immediately click. There’s something about our fan girl brains that make us almost exclusively understandable to each other.

3) I have severely been underestimating Fran Kranz’s acting chops.

4) Sean Maher is so beautiful in person, it could make you cry.

5) Clark Gregg is just adorable in glasses.

6) I am not emotionally or mentally prepared to handle being late for work. I almost gave myself an ulcer stressing about it.

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